Marriage Musings

I renamed this. It was originally called New Awareness. As I read it through it needed a new name. Originally posted in 2011. Now that Christmas is over, I thought I would spend some time updating my blog. I wonder if anyone really reads this tuff, which kind of gives me a freedom to express the things I don't usually share. I has taken me years to be able to put my thoughts on paper. Technology has a lot to do with that. My brain and the keyboard can get into sync and that makes it even more fun. Then there is what to write. How do I decide what to share and what to keep to myself. How do I say this in an appropriate way that others would not only understand but would want to come back and read more. I think you have to check in with both. The heart is important, but the things that need doing need a brain to think the process to the end. I have decided this is a marriage of brain and heart the brings this to the world wide web. After all, the heart is the expressions of life. Right? Our heart is how we feel and the brain tries to make sense of it, at least my brain does. It is king of like marriage. I am a feeling being. My husband is a thinking kind of guy, as many men are. So his brain is always trying to figure out what my heart is trying to say. I hope. That isn't to say that he doesn't feel, although he has been accused of that. It's just that the brain makes things so understandable. Maybe. Our communication is not what it could be. I try so hard to think and understand what he is saying, which isn't too much of a stretch. The hard part comes when I try to talk to him. I have to tell a story, explain things, illustrate the dam point to death. By the time I am done and I say "do you get it?" He is snoring or off doing his man thing in the garage somewhere. I have been known to be angry about this a time or two, (or three). He on the other hand thinks it in his head and that is that. "what do you mean? Of course I told you". Around and around it goes. Communication between married folks can suck. The truth is I like men. I mean, I would rather sit in a room full of men and listen to them talk about politics, than try to talk to any woman about anything. I enjoy their logic, and their candor. I like the way they smell, at least the ones that shower. So why is it so hard when you are married? I don't have any wisdom for this. None that I would dare say. Would I do it again? I would have to say, if I could know the great people that are my kids without being married, I would not get married. But someone, somewhere decided that we needed each other, if only for the sole purpose of bringing life to this planet. So to the brain that isn't too aware of my heart, I say, "may life improve. That as we go along you will learn the language of emotion, and I will learn the logical way that you are, even if you don't say a word.